Narcissists are afraid of life. They are afraid of being vulnerable therefore they take the most destructive way to gain control and power. They hurt people to make themselves feel better, strong and superior. They try to control and dominate others because its distracts them from dealing with their own issues.
The control freak in me struggles immensely with this...I've had to learn that I can only control half of life: my half. The other half is up to everyone else. I need to relax because I can't change them.