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Why periods? Why can't Mother Nature just text me and be like, "Whaddup Girl?" You ain't pregnant. Have a great week. Talk to ya next month."

Why periods? Why can't Mother Nature just text me and be like, "Whaddup Girl?" You ain't pregnant. Have a great week. Talk to ya next month."

I don't understand how some women have 20 plus bridesmaids. I don't even like that many people. | Wedding Ecard | someecards.com

I don't understand how some women have 20 plus bridesmaids. I don't even like that many people. | Wedding Ecard | someecards.com

Life isn't a fairytale. If you lose your shoe at midnight you might want to slow down on the tequila.

Life isn't a fairytale. If you lose your shoe at midnight you might want to slow down on the tequila.

You ask your husband to do the dishes, he suddenly has to poop..Hahahaha!

You ask your husband to do the dishes, he suddenly has to poop..Hahahaha!

0 HAG - House of Fun Only 3 things can change a woman's mood

0 HAG - House of Fun Only 3 things can change a woman's mood

I+don't+fart,+I+whisper+in+my+panties+.+.+.+but+sometimes+it's+a+scream.

I+don't+fart,+I+whisper+in+my+panties+.+.+.+but+sometimes+it's+a+scream.

Sometimes I think, 'Screw this... I'll just be a stripper!' Then I remember I'm fat... and can't dance.

Sometimes I think, 'Screw this... I'll just be a stripper!' Then I remember I'm fat... and can't dance.

I hate when I put food in the microwave & it starts makin explosive noises so I check and it's cold, like why you gotta play me like that.

I hate when I put food in the microwave & it starts makin explosive noises so I check and it's cold, like why you gotta play me like that.

You’re not truly a parent till you’ve swatted blindly into the back seat of the car, hoping to connect with a kid.

You’re not truly a parent till you’ve swatted blindly into the back seat of the car, hoping to connect with a kid.

According to this BMI chart... I am too short. | Confession Ecard | someecards.com

According to this BMI chart... I am too short. | Confession Ecard | someecards.com