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Nothing is more disappointing than a birthday card with no money inside.

Nothing is more disappointing than a birthday card with no money inside.

Whenever I think I'm about to get into trouble, I hide my phone, just in case.

Whenever I think I'm about to get into trouble, I hide my phone, just in case.

If you're too cool for school, then practice saying, 'Would you like fries with that?'

If you're too cool for school, then practice saying, 'Would you like fries with that?'

"Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn't have said."

"Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn't have said."

At night: Never want to sleep.  In the morning: Never want to wake up

At night: Never want to sleep. In the morning: Never want to wake up

That awkward moment when you tell a really bad  joke to an entire group of people and you're the only one laughing.

That awkward moment when you tell a really bad joke to an entire group of people and you're the only one laughing.

Grammar, the main difference between 'Let's eat, Grandma!' and 'Let's eat Grandma!'.

Grammar, the main difference between 'Let's eat, Grandma!' and 'Let's eat Grandma!'.

The older the Facebook post, the creepier your 'like' on it becomes.

The older the Facebook post, the creepier your 'like' on it becomes.

When someone tells me to lower the volume, I lower it but then I slowly raise it back up.

When someone tells me to lower the volume, I lower it but then I slowly raise it back up.

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