The Avengers is the super hero team up of a lifetime, featuring iconic Marvel Super Heroes Iron Man, The Incredible Hulk, Thor, Captain America, Hawkeye and Black Widow. When an unexpected enemy emerges that threatens global safety and security, Nick Fury, Director of the international peacekeeping agency known as S.H.I.E.L.D., finds himself in need of a team to pull the world back from the brink of disaster. Spanning the globe, a daring recruitment effort begins.
S.H.I.E.L.D. Recruit Survival Tip #248:Sex will not cure supervillains. Nor will it cure any superheroes of whatever you think they need curing of. Please keep this in mind or risk a sexual harassment meeting or potential global catastrophe. S.H.I.E.L.D. has enough to deal with already. [Submitted by lithographox]
S.H.I.E.L.D. Recruit Survival Tip #198:S.H.I.E.L.D. training involves lessons in tactical driving for when you will need to know it in the field. That skill is not to be used for the purposes of navigating rush hour traffic.
S.H.I.E.L.D. Recruit Survival Tip #341:Asking members of the Avengers to autograph memorabilia, photos, or personal items is acceptable. Asking members of the Avengers to autograph body parts or items of clothing that you are wearing at the time is a violation of S.H.I.E.L.D.’s sexual harassment policy. Asking director Fury to autograph anything is hazardous to your health. [Submitted by heavilyparaphrased]
S.H.I.E.L.D. Recruit Survival Tip #487: Please refrain from challenging Captain Rogers, Thor, Tony Stark, or Agent Romanov to a drinking game. Any of these challenges will very likely result in your needing medical assistance due to alcohol poisoning.
S.H.I.E.L.D. Recruit Survival Tip #485: Although they have giant blades that spin at deadly speeds, do not use the Helicarrier engines for waste disposal. Any funds needed for repairs will come from your paycheck. [Submitted by hardboiledandwutnot]