It's been 4 years since you've seen her. You haven't paid child support like a real man would, you don't ask how she's doing. You abandoned her & neglecting her since you stopped showing up to court dates 4 years ago. Stop blaming your problems on everyone else. You & your wife are the reason you are in the situation you are in.
Fortunately my ex husband pays his child support regularly, and I am thankful for that. I can't stand when I hear men complain about paying child support, it costs so much more than what anyone understands to raise a child when they grow out of clothes and shoes every month, paying for preschool and daycare, doctors appts, not to mention the basics like a place to live, water for baths and food in their bellies. I pay close to $800 a month just in daycare and preschool. Kids are not cheap.